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Disciplining Zara July 25, 2007

Posted by Zara's Mama in language, parenting, Zara.
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I’m the ‘bad’ guy who disciplines Zara at home. I use scolding, occasional smacking and when she’s really naughty, I’ll be putting her in the naughty corner.

There are times when I try to ‘discipline’ her and she ends up putting a smile on my face (although I try not to let her see that).

We were walking to the park, and she was irritated with something and started whining. I yanked her hand and stopped, stood still and looked at her. She took a glance at me, smiled and said, “Haha, I’m so grouchy..” Immediately, she stopped the annoying behaviour and walked on. 

She was touching the ‘untouchables’ in MIL’s place (glass deco items),  she refused to listen when we told her several times not to touch them, and eventually broke a piece of the glass wear. I told her, “Maybe I should put you in the naughty corner!”
She gestured to the living room corner which was filled with deco items and said, “No, the naughty corner got too many things, I cannot go” o.O”

And there was this time, she was crying for no reason for a long 15mins, so I sent her to the naughty corner. Daddy came to the rescue after a moment, and told her she could come out of it. With tears, she replied, “Cannot! Mummy put me here one!” and then looked at me arms stretched out, “Mummy, I’m sorry! I’m sorry!”
To her, since I’m the one who placed her there, I have to be the one who forgive her.

~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~

There are times, when I see myself in her.

I’d heard her said this to the maids often with a very serious face, when she disapproved of their smiling.
“It’s not funny!! It’s not funny you know! You don’t laugh!”

And she’s ‘scolded’ Zaria for crying, “Mei Mei, you don’t cry! You stop crying! Mummy is working you know. You don’t disturb Mummy.”

I’d heard her said this to her Mr Blue, “Look at me! You go shopping you must hold hands yeah?! You don’t hold hands after you get lost! Then you have no more mummy!”

~~~~~~~~~~ . ~~~~~~~~~~

And recently, she started talking back.
I had been ‘scolding’ her the whole day since she was whiny and cried for the smallest reasons. At night, when I was brushing her teeth and snapped at her again, she told me, “Mummy, you are like a wicked witch la. You always scold me la.”
I didn’t know if I should laugh of be angry with that statement, so I remained straight face and told her, “Mummy scold you sure got reason, ok? Mummy don’t simply scold you.”
End of conversation, for now.

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Comments»

1. Irene - July 25, 2007

Exact same situation here too. I wonder if we had boys, would it be the same?

ZMM : I wonder too.. boys will probably not be able to talk back like girls I think.

2. michelle - July 25, 2007

Yes, I can see myself in Emily too when she use the very words I say on me. Sometimes we learn from our children to correct ourselves.

ZMM : You think this is a girl’s thing? I think girls are better in talking back.

3. Albert - July 25, 2007

Daddy point of view…I have a boy and girl. I can understand sometimes they can drive you up the walls with their whining, actions, tantrums and the list goes on. Those are outward behavior, and what is important is their heart… Children can be taught to obey their parents. To begin with, both daddy & mommy must be in unity when comes to disciplining, otherwise the children will get confuse how come mommy or daddy always the “bad” guy.

My daughter, during 1 year plus (now 2.5 yrs old) starts to throw tantrum. She will scream. You see, we have a house rule, that no one is to throw tantrum in our home. We did cane her backside not because of her throwing tantrum, but disobedience to the parents. Then we explain to her about obedient to parents and we end up with a hug just to let them know we love them, but we disapprove their actions. You see, children have short memory and they might do it again…and again..and again… This is where, if we are not careful, we lose patient and start to whack them when we are angry.

Just give them a swat and have them stay beside you until they are well behave. My son, who is going to be one tomorrow, we taught him obedience about 2 – 3 months back. By now, he knows when we point our index finger, he will stop whatever he is not suppose to touch or play.

Happy parenting

ZMM : Thanks for your parenting tip.. 🙂 As parents, we always learn from our kids as well as other parents. Appreciate your sharing.

4. twin - July 25, 2007

hahha .. i like the part when she said “mommy is like a witch” and the “naughty corner got too many things”. Really hilarious …. they made you laugh isn’t it … 🙂 After hearing that I dun think u’ll be angry with her anymore … 🙂

ZMM : It kinds of wake me up.. not to be too fierce with her.. the wicked witch part. 😛 Yeah.. it’s hard to be angry with her when she say things like that in response.

5. twin - July 25, 2007

do u do tags?? anyway u got tagged … if u don’t that’s ok. 🙂

ZMM : I do, if I have something to talk about..I’ll check out later. 😛

6. laundryamah - July 25, 2007

should i be thankful that kylie is not talking yet?? hahahaha

ZMM : Don’t worry.. your turn will come.. Hahaha.

7. chooi peng - July 25, 2007

Zara very good in kek sei you huh!! LOL

ZMM : Yeah. Don’t know to cry or laugh.

8. mumsgather - July 25, 2007

My girl once told me that my “job” is to scold. Well, she’s right. All mummy’s job is to scold. Lol!

ZMM : Aiks.. your girl also very clever.. Haha.

9. Mamajojo - July 25, 2007

There must be a good guy & bad guy among daddy & mommy. At home I m the good guy who let my children climb up until my head since the bad guy is always not at home.

ZMM : Then who discipline your Jos?

10. Kikare - July 25, 2007

is it very common to add “one” at the end of a sentence when Malaysians speak English? I’m curious…

ZMM : It is.. 🙂 Like a slang.

11. Yvonne - July 25, 2007

Hahaha, Policemommy ar.. it’s tough but better not let her see you smile….:D

ZMM : Yeah.. have to really remain straight face.. 😛

12. chanelwong - July 25, 2007

at least Zara follow your instruction to the corner…Jeriel no way..I am having headache trying to disciplining him…

ZMM : You think it’s a boy’s thing?

13. Angeline Wee - July 25, 2007

Hie,
Reading this.. at times when i put myself into ur shows i know how it feels cause i got a sister who is 11 years younger then me.. to laught or not..i also don’t know!! want to get angry at them i feel bad want to laugh they would think am not serious.. but she is a smart gurl..

ZMM : Haha.. it means I’ll have to live with this for a long long time huh?

14. Cocka Doodle - July 25, 2007

One of these days when she ‘catches’ you and daddy doing naughty things, she’d send YOU to the naughty corner!
Muahahahahaha!!!!

ZMM : You think our lives so action pack like yours meh?

15. sesame - July 25, 2007

Wa, she calls you a wicked witch? Peng san… And it’s the same over my end. I find him imitating the way I talk…in my tone no less.

ZMM : But she does remind me not to be too harsh on her though. 😛
Aaah.. so this is just not a girl’s thing.. boys immitate their mothers too. 😛

16. jazzmint - July 25, 2007

wah wah…she can really yak hehe…really no give face to mommy 😛

ZMM : Give face? What’s that?

17. syn - July 25, 2007

zara so good, only listens to you. when rye li’s at her naughty corner, she will jumped at the opportunity when her papa comes to her rescue.

looks like we moms are mostly the bad guys eh?!

i’m still learning how 2 discipline the girl through trial and error, have been meaning to blog about this as i feel at times i’m too tough on her. my sis nagged me why i like ‘fighting’ with her. haha.

ZMM : People have also said I’m very harsh on her ler.. 😦 So I guess.. really must trial and error.

18. Simple American - July 26, 2007

The wicked witch is a very scarey one. 0_o *runs away*

ZMM : Wicked witch can haunt you.. hahah.

19. Mama BoK - July 26, 2007

Hhahaha!! so like chloe eh..?? Chloe when i scold her.. she would be crying.. and say.. “i’m sorry .. mummy..!! i won’t do it again..!!” sometimes.. so kesian .. ! how to be angry leh..??

ZMM : Wah. Your Chloe knows your soft spot.

20. huisia - July 26, 2007

Zara always looks smart at her age. 🙂
Some statements shown she is a very understanding girl!

ZMM : She’s very clever to ‘talk’ that’s for sure.. understanding or not don’t know woh.

21. nadia - July 26, 2007

Damn, she’s a really smart girl for her age. To be able to give answers like those. Hehe. And it’s good that since you were the one who sent her to the naughty corner, it’s only you who’s allowed to take her out. I hope when my time comes, Irfan would understand it that way too. LOL!

ZMM : You let us know next time yeah, if Irfan is like that. 😛

22. mott - July 26, 2007

Ha ha..I’m a bad cop too. Even to my hub. HA HA HA!

I like her answers tho’… esp when the naugthy corner has too many “cannot touch” things… ha ha ha… very clever!

ZMM : Haha.. your hubs need disiplining too? (actually, most men do. haha)

23. debbie - July 26, 2007

Anyhow, Zara is always so smart and you are a great mom!!

ZMM : Thank you thank you.. if only she thinks the same too.. that I’m a great mum.

24. Sweetpea - July 26, 2007

it’s great to hear all these thoughts from the little ones. you can only wonder what goes on in their little minds.

ZMM : Absolutely. And these responses really tickle me!

25. shern's mom - July 26, 2007

“It’s not funny!! It’s not funny you know! You don’t laugh!” -now zara, that is funny. hahahaha..

ZMM : Zara says, “Shern’s mummy, that’s not funny yeah.. don’t laugh at me.”

26. anggie - July 26, 2007

Like the way she talk like a very mature girl somemore can sound at mummy … sometime not easy to discipline a kids hor … my turn will be very soon. I guess Jeremy will giving me a hard time, he getting very naught now.

ZMM : When he can talk.. it’ll be a different kind of naughty.

27. chooi peng - July 26, 2007

mind to do a fun tag?
http://wchpeng.com/index.php/2007/07/26/on-080808/

ZMM : Hee hee.. don’t know if I can think so far in advance.

28. eastcoastlife - July 26, 2007

Woot! Her answers stumped me too! Smart girl. 🙂

ZMM : Haha.. Auntie Eastcoastlife so clever also get stumped huh?

29. Marie - July 26, 2007

Undeniably, Zara is really smart. Good One Zara! This is the way to discipline your mama. Hahaha….

Anyway…I have a soft spot for children. Even for my sister. When I’m angry at her, she will just give me THE LOOK, and I’ll be her slave. Hate it!

ZMM : Pst.. want to be Zara’s slave?

30. Simple American - July 27, 2007

I have tagged you mam. I want to see how notti you were!!!

ZMM : But I’m really good.. really really good.

31. mom2ashley - July 27, 2007

LOL! Yup i know what you mean when you see yourself in your child…..

ZMM : You must get that a lot too huh?

32. eve - July 27, 2007

Zara you are so adorable lar..come come aunty doctor sayang..Muacksss…

ZMM : Aiks.. and I always threaten her if she’s not naughty, will bring to Aunty Doctor there to get injection tim..

33. ehon - July 27, 2007

lol! she’s gonna be the next genius! so smart! honestly ler, although naughty lar, but she’s smart to be able to come out with all these antics! lol!

ZMM : Yah.. amusingly naughty.. 😛

34. Jesslyn - July 27, 2007

ya, they are like the mirror, got to watch out what we say actually!

btw, i tag u here: http://www.onelittle2.com/index.php/tag-080808/

ZMM : Eh.. you mummies really can plan so far in advance ah?

35. Giddy Tiger - July 27, 2007

And for that, you really rock! I tagged you here.

ZMM : Thank you thank you..
😛

36. mom of cairo - July 28, 2007

same problem here too. so many times i know i should be correcting cairo when she has done something wrong. and yet the hilarity of what she has done is too distracting!!!

ZMM : Huh.. and how did you respond?

37. ben - July 28, 2007

i would like to meet her in real life` hahaha should be very interesting` 😀

ZMM : Can can.. she’ll be so impressed that you are a musician. She probably thinks you are Uncle Lang Lang (as in Lang Lang the pianist).

38. may - July 28, 2007

I think she’s growing up to be quite the conversationalist, even when she’s talking back… lol! I’m finding it quite amusing as well!

ZMM : I wonder if it’ll be still amusing when it’s 5 years later. 😦

39. slavemom - July 29, 2007

Zara is vy smart to talk back (which she’s not supposed to) in a way where ppl will get less angry with her.

ZMM : I don’t think she knows I’ll be less angry.. she just like to talk back.. 😛

40. sue - July 30, 2007

Don’t they just make you wanna laugh with their smart retort 😀 Ivan does that too, and sometimes after punishing him, he’ll remember it for ages and be mad at me… 0.o”

ZMM : Serious? But he’s a boy, he’s supposed to forget more easily? I thought girls would bare grudges longer.. But Zara is good, she will forgive and forget real soon.

41. Immomsdaughter - July 30, 2007

Zara may be naughty but she is obedient at the same time. See, she dare not even move out of her naughty corner! That’ the hardest part when it comes to punishing.

Btw, can’t help laughing at your wicked witch title. Lol.

42. RIna - July 31, 2007

she’s one gutsy girl. They really pick up from their mummy’s speech. I can see so much of my style in Harvynna too. Its actually amazing since she spends most of her time at the babysitters but its the mother that they emulate

43. Simple American - August 2, 2007

Must prove it lah!!!


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