Breastfeeding – The Ugly side April 26, 2007Posted by Zara's Mama in breastfeeding, parenting.
I’m pro-breast feeding, I know there are lots of benefit for the mums (reduce risk in breast cancer, getting back in shape faster, savings on future medical expenses etc) and the babies (better immunity, better DHA absorption). I enjoy feeding the kids, the way they look at you when they suckle, the smile they give you after they are full. The most satisfying feeling I have is knowing I’m the nutrient provider for my kids, I’m in control! For Zara I did it until I was conceived with Zaria, i.e. when Zara was 18months. And with Zaria, I plan to at least do it for 1 year, and see how we go from there.
As much as I enjoy it, it’s not all rosy though. Here is the ugly side which I experienced. (Potential breast feeding mums out there, you know you are not alone if you too experienced this when you start breast feeding your kids)
1) Painful nipples for the first few days – Some people stop breast feeding because of the pain. I thought it would be better the 2nd round, but since I’d stopped for 6months before Zaria arrived, the nipples got tender again. I had to bite my lips and endure the pain, and I could see the layer of skin coming off, sometimes pieces of them found in Zaria’s lips. Blech.
Luckily, it was only for 2, 3 days and the nipples ‘toughened’.
2) Rock hard super big breasts – I don’t mind being super big (think 2 cup size increase the least), but when you get an engorgement, fuyoh, the breasts become rock hard (and of course big) and pretty uncomfortable until they are emptied! After Zaria drank from one side, I can see my 2 obviously different size breasts, a funny sight!
3) Block Ducts – Hate it, but it happens sometimes. I have to put warm AND cold compress on the breast, massage it, COMB it (supposed to unblock the duct). Daddy won’t help to un-clog it, but he wouldn’t mind bringing the warm and cold towels.
3) Breast leak – I used reusable breast pads for economic reasons (disposable pads per pair are more expensive than a piece of Mami Poko diaper!). When Zaria feeds, and let down happens, the other breast will start to leak big time. My breast pad can’t hold the milk, and it sips through the bra and I get a wet patch on my top. Oh boy, not a pretty sight especially when I’m out.
Sometimes in the night, the breasts get so engorged that they start to leak even though there’s no feeding taking place. I wake up feeling a cold draft on my chest, caused by a big wet patch; and I get milk stain on my bed sheets and bolster. The room smells of milk!
4) Can’t be away from the baby too long – We sometimes leave Zaria at home and go out with just Zara in tow. Maybe this is a good thing, I can’t be away from Zaria for more than 6 hours (i.e. 2 feeds). If we do go out, I have to pump before we leave the house, and pump again immediately after I get home. If we leave her longer than that, my breast will get engorged and uncomfortable, and I can’t pump when I get home as it’s too near Zaria’s next feeding time (or she’ll not have enough to drink during her feed).
5) Pump and Pump and Pump – I like to direct feed more than pumping out. But if we need to go out, or if I need to go to the office, I have to pump. I hate it more when I come back from an outing, no matter how tired and sleepy and late, I have to pump; just so the bottle of milk taken can be replenished (and also to maintain supply). Zzzzzzzz.
And have you seen the nursing clothes available in Malaysia? Totally utterly ugly! So I just wear normal clothes and when I have to breast feed in public, I’ll cover myself with a nursing cape.
Why I got married to Daddy April 23, 2007Posted by Zara's Mama in myself.
This is difficult, hmmm, I myself sometimes question why I got married to Daddy. He’s not a bad guy really, but sometimes we can be so out of sync, I just wonder.. And I guess when you have been together with a person so long, you sometimes forgot what made you come together in the first place. When I got tagged by Whoisbaby and Mott, I have to think real hard.
So what made me tie the knot with him 9 years ago? After much thinking, here are the ten reasons :
1. I was smitten when I first laid eyes on him, it was my first day at work, and my then manager introduced me to him. That friendly smile and firm handshake swap me off my feet. Remember Jerry Maquire? After a lenghty romantic plea by Jerry Maquire, Dorothy Boyd said, “You had me at ‘hello.'”.. it was something like that for me as well.
2. He’s a 6-footer. Makes me look petite standing next to him (good enough reason?). It also gives me a secure feeling.
3. He’s an anglophile, and I’m a bit of an anglophile too. We like almost the same English Pop and movies.
4. He’s good with DIY-ing. He built me an adaptor for my disc man the first month we were together and I was damn impressed (that was then.. it takes more to impress me now).
5. He eats bread every single day for breakfast (even when we’re on vacation and staying in hotels which served good buffet breakfast). I’d heard some where that a person who can eat the same breakfast every day, must be able to stay with the same woman for the rest of his life. 🙂
6. He gives me freedom, allows me to work on my studies or my career – He’s the one who encouraged me to further my studies overseas, when all my other selfish and possesive ex boy friends
forced asked me to stay back (and I was stupid enough to listen to them).
7. He’s a practical person. He won’t surprise me with flowers or any of such ‘romantic’ gifts. But he’ll get me bags, shoes, jewelry that I’d picked out myself (no surprises). When I was studying overseas, instead of love letters and cards, he showed me his love by sending me my supplies of Chinese herbs, Chinese mushrooms, Milo etc (boring eh? but I’m in control of what I get. :)).
8. He takes care of himself, eats and drinks well, doesn’t smoke (I’d had my share of smoker ex boy friends). Only indulgence is the occasional beer or wine. He helps me to take care of myself too, watch what I eat, etc.
9. He gives me room to have my own friends, do my own things, go on my own trips.
10. He agreed to live in my dad’s house with my dad (a widower who would live alone in a big house if I moved out) after we got married, even though his parents were not very happy. It was 6 years later that we moved to our own house (my dad now lives with my sis).
Now… I remember why I got married to him. 🙂 Thanks to Mott and Whoisbaby.
Co-Sleeping April 19, 2007Posted by Zara's Mama in my two girls, parenting.
I find I have more peace with the kids sleeping next to me.
Although Zaria has her cot (away from our bed), I prefer her to sleep with us on our queen size bed. I place her nearer to my side of the bed, and I’ll just squeeze into Zara’s bed and share hers in the night. That way, Daddy sleeps more comfortably, Zara is happy to be able to hug me like a bolster to sleep and I get to check on Zaria in the night.
Every night, I have Zaria on my right, and Zara on my left. Before I go to bed, I look at both of them soundly asleep, and I feel blissful.
…. (speechless) April 17, 2007Posted by Zara's Mama in development, language, Zara.
At the dinner table, Zara didn’t want to eat her vege.
Daddy *coaxing her* :”You must eat your vege, so you’ll grow up properly.”
Zara : “No, I don’t want.”
Daddy : “blah blah blah. You must eat.”
After a few times of Daddy ‘nagging’ her, she finally said, “Daddy, it’s difficult. It’s difficult to eat the vege Daddy.” (her first time using the word ‘difficult’)
Zara didn’t want to drink water.
Me : “Zara, please drink some water.”
Zara : “I don’t want.”
Me : “Zara, mummy tell you nicely, please drink some water ok?”
Zara : “Mummy, I tell you nicely, no thank you please”
Zara likes to sit with her legs opened wide, and has just recently learnt that a boy’s petpet (reproductive organ) is called “penis”.
She had her legs opened wide the other day in her car seat. To encourage her to be more lady like, I told her : “Zara, you sit like that you’ll grow a penis in your petpet.”
Very quickly she responded, “Last time daddy sit(sat) down open(ed) his legs big big that’s why his petpet got penis now.”
Zaria at 3 1/2 months April 13, 2007Posted by Zara's Mama in development, Zaria.
At 2 1/2 months :
She weighed 5.45Kg and
stood lay at 60cm
At 3 1/2 months :
She’s not as chubby as she used to be (but haven’t weighed or measured her yet).
The 0-3months clothes fit snugly now, and she’s starting to fill up the 3-6months clothes.
She drinks 3oz ~ 4oz of breast milk three hourly, 1st feed at 5am or 6am and last feed at 10pm or 11pm.
She takes 3 to 4 naps a day, from a 15mins doze to a 2 hours nap.
She smiles a lot, especially when spoken to.
She cooes when we talk to her or when we sing to her, sometimes competing with Zara to see who is lounder.
She likes to sit on our lap or on the sofa (supported), but dislikes being placed on her tummy.
When Zara watches TV, she stares at the TV as though she’s also watching with Zara.
She experianced her first dip in the pool and a bubble bath together with Zara.
She recognises me as the milk giver. Every time when she’s hungry and I carry her, she’ll be turning towards my breast and flinging her arm, preparing to latch on.
When she drinks from the breast, she likes to latch on then pullll, latch on then pullllll, a few times before she settles down to drink. Imagine the pain! “=.=
Whe she drinks from the bottle, she just pushes the teat out from her mouth, complaining, fusing, crying. Milk is consumed by dripping into her mouth. “=.=
She has bowel movement 3 to 4 days once, and usually after her lunch feed.
She tries to reach out for things, when she does touch it, she quickly puts her fingers around the item and tries puting it in her mouth.
Daddy and I think she’s really cute. Zara also ‘thinks’ Zaria is cute; so cute that she can’t ‘help’ but give Zaria too tight a squeeze at times and just yesterday, bit Zaria’s nose, leaving teeth mark. “=.=
Look at the way she stares at the TV like Zara, as though she’s really watching TV. She was wee bit shocked being in the pool
My Other “Daughter” April 9, 2007Posted by Zara's Mama in misc, my two girls.
You know I have two beautiful daughters Zara and Zaria. I also have this other “daughter”, she lives in Xinjiang Uygur Autonomous Region, and her name is Hairegulihan Tuerxuntuohuti. She’s my sponsored child from World Vision Malaysia(世界宣明会).
Our relationship started sometime in 2003. I didn’t have a child and I wanted one. I went to World Vision Malaysia website, and selected to sponsor a girl from Xinjiang. They found me Hairegulihan. I wrote to her just once, in the very begining, and sent her some little gifts. Some how after that, I got very busy, and stopped writing to her (Yeah yeah, I know, it’s no excuse).
My other ‘daughter’ – Hairegulihan
Called it good karma, I got pregnant in 2004 (after 6years of marriage), and blessed with Zara.
Every year, I get a progress report from World Vision with her photo telling me how she’s doing. There’s this hapiness that I experiance every time I receive her progress report and see the smile on her face. Happy to know that some one far away is benefiting from a small deed I’m doing.
Hairegulihan’s latest progress report
World Vision Malaysia is trying get 5000 child sponsors this year to celebrate their 10th year anniversary. As a sponsor, your contribution together with others are pooled together to be invested in long-term development programmes that will give your sponsored child, his/her family and community a brighter future.
How much does it cost to sponsor a child? RM50/month.
If you are interested, click on the icon below or check out their website to get more information. You can also choose to do a one time donation to this trusted organisation which will use your fund appropriately to help those needed.
Ikea’s 10 years Warranty April 7, 2007Posted by Zara's Mama in bitching, home.
Daddy is very supportive of Ikea. When we moved in to our new house, we tried to get most of our furniture from Ikea. People had adviced us against getting wardrobe and kitchen cabinet from Ikea, claiming they are not suitable for our weather. Daddy, however, thought the 10 years warranty given were good ‘guarentee’ enough.
So despite the advice, we bought our kitchens (both wet and dry) cabinets from Ikea. It was the Nexus Oak series that we got, doors were just oak veneer but we paid quite a lot for them.
After just 2 years, the doors started to have stains, a darkish patch started spreading like some kind of disease. Even the plinth (or the skirting) caught the stain.
Daddy started making calls to Ikea. At first, they claimed we need to bring the items back for exchange. Kitchen doors! To uninstall them and bring them in for exchange!! Daddy asked to speak to higher management, his voice was louder with each calls made.
After a few more calls, the Ikea contractor who did the installation were called in to do inspection, followed by Ikea folks, snapping photos here and there. Then, we were told Nexus Oak is no longer available, how about if they replaced the affected doors with aluminium doors (or was it glass?) or Nexus Birch (similar in price to what we paid). We made several trips to Ikea, to see how we can mix and match our doors, i.e. the current Nexus Oak coexisting with a few aluminium doors or Nexus Birch. I just couldn’t see how they will match.
Daddy made more calls, speaking to various people mainly from customer service, voicing his concerns. Eventually, they agreed to replace our doors and plints with whatever material we choose from their available series! We chose solid oak (Ulriksdal Oak) to replace the oak veneer, it’s more expensive, but the closest we can get to our original doors.
We made our decision in the little room in Ikea.
Customer Service : “Blah blah blah…. Solid Oak then?”
Me : “But they look odd, some with grooves (Ulriksdal Oak) and some without (Nexus Oak)”
Customer Service : “All your doors will be replaced.”
Me : *pupil widened*“At no cost?”
Customer Service : “Yeah, we bear the cost”
Daddy : (usually a bit slow) “How can they charge us? But yeah man, the doors will be a bit mismatch, some with grooves some without.”
Me : *nudged Daddy” “She said ALL doors lah!”
Daddy : *pupil widened (finally got it)* “ALL the DOORS? At no cost?”
Customer Service : “Yes.”
Few days later, doors and plints were sent over by the delivery guys (at NO COST), then Ikea contractor dropped by to install them (at NO COST), and the old doors and plints were packed and brought back to Ikea (at NO COST).
We got our kitchen cabinets upgraded a few days later AT NO COST!
Daddy was happily exclaiming, “See, that’s what I call customer service. And that’s why I don’t want to buy my kitchen cabinets from some Ah Chong company. With Ikea’s 10 years warranty, I don’t have to worry if anything goes wrong”
This is true, but not without some noise making though.
Delicious Milk April 5, 2007Posted by Zara's Mama in breastfeeding, language, my two girls.
You know your milk is delicious when :
1) Your baby drinks it up with no complain
2) Your fussy toddler (with acute sense of taste) waits by the side when baby is drinking the milk from a bottle and excitedly says, “Meimei, you don’t want huh? Cannot finish huh? Faster give jiejie drink then.”
3) Whatever your baby can’t finish (from the bottle), you toddler grabs it and happily empties the bottle, exclaiming, “Yummy” or “So nice” at the end of it
4) Your toddler occasionally cries and asks to be fed from the breast. When you tell her she’s already a big girl, she replies, “I’m only a baby, I want to drink from mummy’s breast.”
And if you want to know, nope, I didn’t let the toddler feed from the breast.
Short Take – Back to Work April 3, 2007Posted by Zara's Mama in bitching, breastfeeding, my two girls, myself.
The kids were still sleeping at 9:45am! Not being awaken. I asked Tuyam, “Kalau mereka tidur sampai 12pm, you biar kan saja lar?” (Malay : If they slept till 12pm, you’ll leave them sleeping?)
My boss commented, “Full time mum and you have a part time job eh?” when I had my 1 on 1 with him. Apparently he read this post “=.=
Zara was so happy to see me home yesterday, she wanted to sit on my lap while I had dinner, and kept stroking my face. I was away from her for 10hours (the last I was away this long, it was when I went for my biz trip in Jul ’06).
Zaria refused to drink milk from the bottle and cried every time the bottle was placed in her mouth. She took less than 4oz while I was at work. She preferred to go hungry, and waited for me. She drank hungrily when I offered her the breast when I got home. =.=”
Work?? Pile high! 3000mails and every thing is urgent!! Well.. almost.
There’s also this new program, which I have little knowledge of and I have to pick it up and run!