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Confinement Lady – Liability to the home January 24, 2007

Posted by Zara's Mama in bitching, home.

I don’t like to bitch in my blog, but I can’t help it.

In the house, my reign is in the kitchen. The utencils we used, the kitchen cabinets are mainly my choices, and I’m most proud of it. Now when you have a Madam-Know-It-All or Madam-Absent-Minded at home, what happened?

First incident : Madam-Know-It-All
We heard grinding sound in the wet kitchen and I thought the CL must be preparing some soup. I took a peek. To my horror, she was actually sharpening our Zwilling Ja Henckels knife on our stone mortar.
“What are you doing??”
“Sharpening your knife, it’s blunt.”
“What?? Do you know this is an expensive knife and should only use the proper sharperner to sharpen it?”
“My other clients also use this brand of knife ma, and they just use the stone mortar to sharpen it.”
“That’s their problem!! Please, the next time when you want to do such things, ask us if it’s ok first!”
There goes my RMXXX knife.

Incident Two : Madam-Forgetful
After her bath, Zara came down and mentioned, “Mmmm, I smelled toast.” I sniffed the air and smelled something sweet, asking if Tuyam was making toast, but she said nope.
Got her to check the wet kitchen and she said the CL is double boiling something and the water has dried up.
Called for the CL (who was somewhere reading her papers) and she went to have a check.
“Aiya.. I thought still got lots of water, didn’t know dried up liao.”
After some scrub scrub, wash wash, the wok could not be saved. The CL was double boiling DOM ginger chicken soup for me, and the sweetish DOM has spilled out and got burnt, leaving a blackish crust on the wok.
There goes my well seasoned wok.

Incident Three : Madam-Know-It-All AND Madam-Absent-Minded
I was reading a book to Zara and preparing for bed, and suddenly the CL came up and said, “Aiya, I was pouring out your soup and the pot burnt me, so I quickly placed the pot on your kitchen top. Now there’s a mark there. I’ll go ask your husband to have a look.” and she went out to the study to get Daddy.
I thought it was a small matter but I heard a loud scream from Daddy.
Oh boy, must be bad, I quickly went down to have a look.
Sure thing, our two year old Ikea kitchen top has a big burnt mark on it just next to the sink. (Ouch!)
“Aiya, not serious lar. Can use paint to paint it, then you won’t see the mark any more. I forgot ma. All my clients have tiles kitchen top. Didn’t know yours is wood, can burn.”
I was so furious I just said, “Few days ago, the wok, now this!”
This is by far the worst damage, because you can’t just change the top, it’s too troublesome, we’ll have to live with this ugly mark for as long as we still have this kitchen cabinets!
Kitchen top

Scarred for Life!

Daddy told me to cool it just in case she may do some thing to Zaria. He mentioned he’ll settle with her this Sat, her last day! The worst thing we could do is not to give her ang pow, what else can we do?

And I haven’t even included the shower head that she broke on Day 3 she arrived in our house! Niah Mah! KNN! @#%!@#%



1. domesticgoddess - January 24, 2007

I can imagine your frustration with her! Just by reading I’m already 火滚 beh tahan liao… what more to have to put up with her for almost 30 days!!!

2. jesslyn - January 24, 2007

Well…not easy to “live” with stranger ya!

3. Sasha - January 24, 2007

oh no . U scolding $%#%$#% That means VERY ANGRY EDI! Chill Chill until Saturday only okay?

4. Feon-rabbit - January 24, 2007

Oh my.. What kind of confinement lady..

5. nadia - January 24, 2007

OH-MY-GOD! What kind of a person is she? So ganas, everything oso rosak? Sheeeeessshhh! Forget about giving her her ang pow and good riddance to her this Saturday! I can understand your anger and frustation. Can’t you cut her fees as well? Since she dah rosak the wok, countertop, shower head, etc etc?

6. laundryamah - January 24, 2007

warao eh! i heard a lot of stories about CLs but this one, really maximum la! Ask her to compensate for the wok la! Damn, collect RM3000 cannot forget one leh! Compensate! Compensate! Compensate! I support!!

7. geetha - January 24, 2007

I can imagine how you”re feeling right now. You can really tahan her for so long ah?

8. kingswife - January 24, 2007

It’s ok one, bitch all you like. If you can’t do it here, where else can you do it? I’m sure you feel better now. 😀

Shower head also can break ah? What on earth did she do with it??

9. Eileen - January 24, 2007

First time i saw $%### in your blog…your blood must be boiling!

Never mind, ‘loon’ (hokkien: endure) until Saturday, then give it to her all at once…i read already also buay tahan..sigh…

10. Sabrina - January 24, 2007

My goodness. Such a clumsy and irresponsible lady. This is the reaason why I dislike hiring a confinement lady. I’d rather have my aunt to take care of me. I know how u feel. I would have strangled her.haha….

11. Angeline - January 24, 2007

alamak!!! the burnt is a real teruk one la… ask her to compensate la. give her the wages but less the whatever damage she has done la… bad bad CL!!!

12. Shannon - January 24, 2007

Saturday is coming…
You cursing leh!!! But, I’d probably be slapping her already! And yeah, Tecky told me the same thing with my CL, DO NOT say n’thing DO NOT show bad face, else you dunno wat they’ll do… To you (they cook your meal) or the kid… Mine put dead lizard (I suspect on purpse) into my mandi water, then laughed and acted like she didn’t know about it….
CL can be irritating but they damn daring I tell you….

and all the damages… aiyoh… no wonder you’re pissed… pft! 2 more days… just 2…

13. chooi peng - January 24, 2007

The CL so bad la.. pity ur kitchen cabinet, the wok and the Zwilling knife!
Mind to share who is that CL ah? Scare accidently hire the same CL!!!

14. may - January 24, 2007

aisey… must deduct cost of damages from her wages! how can laidet wan? grrrr… *bares teeth*

15. sesame - January 24, 2007

Wah, I see already also seething…but your hubs is right. Better keep cool cos of Zaria. Some of these pple could also be wicked with tricks up their sleeves. But bear for a few more days and all will be well.

Your kitchen top, can you put like a nice table cloth or decorative item over to cover up?

16. sesame - January 24, 2007

Eh, think my message got eaten up as spam…

17. LB - January 24, 2007

It’s good to bitch! I wanna bitch too!! (But sometimes, when we bitch, we get all mis-quoted too, so better not to bitch anymore so much..)
My maid, when she first started, was so the luun chun! Breaking priceless objects by the day! My little first goldfish bowl which I used as a little piggie bank – smashed. A beautiful glass vase from Sofia – smashed! Etc etc etc… *sigh*

18. simple american - January 24, 2007


Scared to ask what she did to the shower head. I would not want her near my kid. Actually be scared to eat what she cooked now.


19. syn - January 24, 2007

oh my, first time i see you so angry. ok, u’ve made my decision for me, i’m never ever going to attempt to even try to look for a CL.

on the brighter side, there’s only another 3 more days you have to tahan and yes, you should not give her the ang pow at all! just thank her politely and that’s it. remember you’ll always have the scar 2 remind u of her.

20. jazzmint - January 24, 2007

aiyo…she seems like couldn’t care less and make so many mistakes one…bad bad!!! nvm, 3 more days only..cut he salary maybe hahaha

21. greenapple - January 24, 2007

i cannot tahan this too man .. i can so feel your anger … very much indeed.

actually i realized i share a lot of same emotions are you. your views about many issues i just can’t help but to concur …

it’s really nice to know you here, your two girls’ mum.

will stay extremely loyal to your blog. keep them coming. =)

22. shoppingmum and kids - January 24, 2007

You’re so patient! For the first incident, I’ll sure scold her like hell already!
But you hubby’s right, Zaria comes first…

23. Desperate Mummy - January 24, 2007

Wah, u case same as me n now I end up wif my hand pain cos I wash the toilet by myself 😦

24. fannie - January 25, 2007

damn pek chek when I read on…she’s made mistakes yet isn’t apologetic at all? Gosh!!! To think that this kinda CL actually exist. Scary!

25. Ms Fair Face - January 25, 2007

i probably will blow my top if my CL is like this too! Doesn’t seem to be helping but more of a burden sheesh.

maybe you might wanna consider changing your CL?

26. KGC - January 25, 2007

It is quite impossible to find a ‘GOOD’ CL these days. I had my share of them too. Can we do without them? If only we don’t have to follow the pantang-larang, I think we can do without them. I admire your patience!

27. Yvonne - January 25, 2007

1st time here… chill out.. chill out. Mine lagi teruk. I got a temp one cos I had an early labour. This temp out suddenly went gila and FORGOT-EVERYTHING overnight. In the morn, she passed Ryan to me without diaper, just wrapped him with towerl. When I confronted her, she said “Oh, I forgot”. How could one forgot to put on a diaper on baby?? Gosh.. Then when it’s time for lunch.. she just slept on the bed and I had to look after Ryan myself. When I asked her again abt lunch, she said “Oh, I forgot”. I sent her back that night itself. Gila! Luckily I got another replacement the next day. So chil, chil, chil..you’re a new mummy. Don’t be so stress la.. 🙂

28. seefei - January 25, 2007

hei this is bad! all CL must be given basic training. in HK, all CL who “practice” got to go through a 5-day training course. your CL action is like my mum but she is 90 years who think she is still 19. Thats why we had to send her away to stay with my bro when the reno is on and will ban her from the kitchen when she come back. She had burned a fair share of our woks and left a burn mark on the our plastic sink.

i will get a CL from HK (my sis in law) next time. i guess your CL from hell is not an isolated case. My sis in law is stil in her 40s and prob will click with wifey and understand our need better.

29. my2lovelyrays - January 25, 2007

aiyo, i read nia also pek chek for you lor…..alamak….she qualified to be a CL anot?

30. huisia - January 25, 2007

OMG..this CL really lousy la..
Sometimes really depends luck to get a good CL oo..i start worrying about my CL now.

31. zara's mama - January 25, 2007

Yeah wor. If she wasn’t good and gentle with Zaria, we would have kicked her out. That’s the only thing she’s good at.

Yeah. Especially sharing the room, the toilet, and all your personal space. Haih.

Yeah wor. Wanted to use the F word liao. But parenting blog.. have to cool it. 😛

Feon Rabbit,
It’s really hard to get good CL these days. 😦

I think these old ladies are pretty forgetful and they are not used to modern utencils ler. My hubby plans to not give the ang pow, and maybe reduce some of her fees too. I let him handle it when he sends her back on Sat.

Their fee where they’ll forget one. I let hubby handles lar.

I tahan for the sake of re-building my health, and also for the 1st month, I don’t want to pay too little attention to Zara. If I don’t have her, I’ll have to do everything on my own, and then Zara will be more neglected which will be bad for her. Anyway, 2 more days to go.

King’s Wife,
Don’t know what she did with the shower head lar. Twist and turn until rosak.

Yeah. I’m just ‘loon’. After this.. Merdeka! Independence!

You have your aunt to take care. I have nobody. 😦 That’s why. Anyway, 2 more days to go.

Yeah, probably that’s what we’ll do.

Aiyo.. yours so evil? Put dead lizard?
Yah, we don’t want to show her sour face lar, since I don’t want her to mishandle Zaria.

Chooi Peng,
The CL is Mdm Toh, from Muar. Is yours her? Hope not. She’s not so bad, but you just have to bare with her spoiling your things.

Wow.. so many people asked me to deduct the wages, I think we’ll have to do something about it already..

The kitchen top is too near the sink.. can’t really do anything to hide the damage unfortunately.

Aiyo. Italiano maid? Didn’t know you also have such bad experience.

Simple American,
Shower head is small matter, because we can get it easily changed. It’s the kitchen top that we can’t do much about.
Yikes.. you think she’ll poison me?

Actually if you can help it, it’s best not to have CL. But for me, I just wanted to spend some time with Zara that’s why I opted to have one.

Yeah wor. And she dares to tell my maid, that we didn’t scold her for the damage she made. Tulan or not?

32. allyfeel - January 25, 2007

Warou eh, u must be fuming men, all the swearing. Aiyoo…burnt ur things already still got so much excuses. She doesn’t deserve ang pow la.

33. zara's mama - January 25, 2007

Haha.. same emotions? Maybe we were born under the same star sign.

I dare not scold lar.. worried after she’ll cubit Zaria.

Desperate Mummy,
You mean you fried your CL?

Yeah wor. Some more got the cheek to tell my maid we didn’t scold her. So no big deal.

Ms Fair Face,
She helps out in terms of cooking for me and caring for Zaria (but then I’m breast feeding, not much caring she can do too), that’s about it.

It’s really hard to get good CL huh?
I think we can do without them, depending on how hands on you want to be. My case is I wanted to spend more time with Zara, so I hired one. If it’s my first kid, I’ll probably do without, like I did with Zara.

Wah lau.. where you got your forgetful CL? From Old Folks Home ah?

See Fei,
Wow.. you are going HK to get a CL? Expensive loh.

In M’sia where got qualified or not one? Any body also can be CL one. Only thing is.. can trust or not?

She’s lousy in terms of handling my things at home lar. *sigh*

34. mott - January 25, 2007

Sorry so late. two more days and she’s out. or…just pack her out now la.! Nvmla…no more CL already!!!! Take care ok… happy thoughts! Happy thoughts!

35. Ivy - January 25, 2007

wahhh lau ehhhhh she is so damn irritating. if she is in my house I’ll have asked her to “F” off!!!! 😡 opps excuse me…

36. helen - January 25, 2007

It’s really hard having to live with a stranger. Summore one that is like your CL. For your case, you don’t have much of a choice. So, 忍 first. 🙂

忍, 忍, 忍…

37. mybabybay - January 25, 2007

Alamak. I remembered my CL also spoiled my expensive wok. She fried with high heat. Then she blamed my maid instead. Hrmm…Oh well, you can put $10 and a list of damages in her angpow. 😛

38. Vien - January 26, 2007

OMG! My jaw dropped when I saw that pic! Few more days only…sabar ar!

39. Samm - January 26, 2007

Havent you considered deducting it from her wages. If me, i would, believe you me. She should be resposnsible for all the damages done, no excuses. She’s a professional, for chrissake. As for the angpow, i’ll give, for “lai-lai si-si” sake. And over here, i curse on your behalf, k.

40. mom2ashley - January 26, 2007

argh! whata nightmare! thank GOD her last day is this sat…

41. Tracy - January 26, 2007

Haiyo, u really don’t have the ‘meng shui’ to have CL. I remembered when u had Zara, the CL was lousy too. Where did u get such CL? I thought mine was bad (who napped and smoked) but urs ……… ?????? *speechless* It’s really so difficult to get GOOD CL nowadays.

42. 2littlefellas' mom - January 26, 2007

what a relief she is out of the house by NOW!!!
who knows what she will break or damage next…..

43. Jenn - January 26, 2007

Oh I dislike CLs with a capital D. I almost murdered my first one, and refused to employ another for my second child. My mom helped me out. I ate whatever I wanted based on what I read, no stress, no awkwardness, no wanting to commit blue murder, no need to waste money.

I’m sorry to say I think it’s an archaic imperialist tradition (u know, back when China was still imperialist) that serves no purpose other than to be Chinese, particularly if u know what to cook/eat, have established a sleep-while-nursing routine.

44. daddykhong - January 26, 2007

Goodness, poor worktop. Is it laminate or solid surface?

I think it’s nice of her to sharpen the knife with so little time left in the house. Aiya, these aunties from smallish towns won’t know what a Zwillings knife is anyway. Well, always can get the latest from them.

I am glad we did not get a CL. But damn stressed now looking after 2 kids and a nursing mum.

45. puifuen - January 26, 2007

sorry to hear abt your CL. i think my CL is fine, she’s from puchong and she had worked in UK before. so far, she hasn’t broken or damaged anything. she has also been a tremendous help, except when it comes to food for the baby. i know she has our best interest at heart, but i’d really rather she wakes me up to breastfeed than to just make formula milk for my son. aigh. anyhow, she does nap too when we’re all napping. she wakes up earlier than i do! i dun mind…as long as she get things done 🙂 so far so good!! oh…she’s just a tad bit more chatty than usual 😉

46. zara's mama - January 26, 2007

Err.. we’ll wait one more day. Then she’ll be out. I’m fine now.

Wah.. so fierce huh you? I want to scold her kao-kao also, but I’m worried she may pinch Zaria when we’re not looking, so better not.

Yes.. 忍, just one more day.

Hey, the ang pow thing, it’s a must is it? Hubby already decided she’ll get none!

Yes, tomorrow and it’s MERDEKA!

Hubby plans to do that, deduct her wages.
Professional? Confinement lady got professional one meh?


Actually she’s not really that bad. I mean I wouldn’t have tolerated her if it’s all bad. She’s good with Zaria, so I close one eye. But the kitchen top really was the last straw of all the things she damaged in the house.

2littlefella’s mom,
She knows we’re very upset and I can see she’s very careful after the kitchen top incident already. Haih, but it only takes such a big accident to make her realize she should be more careful.

The thing is I don’t have any body to help me except my maid, and we have Zara to care for. So, I used a CL. If Zaria was my first born, I wouldn’t have been bothered with a CL. Since maid has to do house work and care for Zara, I thought it would have been good to have some one cook for me and help with Zaria.
I know, this CL thing is really an old fashion believe. If you have mom or MIL to help out, it would be the best, especially the cooking part, unfortunately, my mom has passed on and my MIL did not want to help.

You have an aunty to help out right? Yes, looking a toddler and a new born at the same time can be very stressful.

Hey, you have to show me your BB’s photo. Your CL seems like very good. I don’t have such luck with CL. Sigh.

47. KittyCat - January 26, 2007

Ugh…I don’t think they are not trained but rather trained at some “secret” training institute where they are taught to:
a. hog the Astro channel
b. take over your kitchen
c. break things or spoil the most valuable/obvious items where possible and
d. drink your XO!

My CL broke my Mum’s kitchen counter tiles, my towel hooks (amazing coz it’s supposed to withstand >10 kg and tried as we could, even hubby couldn’t snap it off!). CL also commented my XO is good quality…hubby got it from US you see. I’m so scared of them already but what choice is there??? Confinement home?

48. Jenn - January 27, 2007

Yea I know it’s hard but u dont know the depth of my hatred for CLs lol I also worked part time so it was just nuts having to cope with everything. House was a disaster and hubby had to help out a lot. Now I’m a FT mom, no maid etc. House is still a disaster. And Im thinking of having a third one, believe it or not. Husband thinks I shld masuk cheng san.

49. Annie Q - January 28, 2007

oooppss..i’m a bit late. I think yesterday is her last day already? Ya..CL..lots of story.I understand how u feel and how anger u’re. I do come across this too. My CL even argue with my in law they all.Leave me in a very bad situation till i cry for almost 30 days during my confinement month!!! And everyday she needs to eat fruits, she need to have afternoon nap!Adoi! Scared of CL already!

50. passingsights - January 28, 2007


51. kwai yoke - January 29, 2007

Luckily she is good at handling the baby, else you would have kicked her out to outer space. As a mother, for the baby’s sake, all also can 忍. That’s what a great mommy will do. 😉

52. ian - January 30, 2007

i want to say that u have lovely daughters..makes me want my own pair!!

53. Immomsdaughter - January 30, 2007

I know I’m not supposed to laugh but I had to! Never heard you swearing on your blog before so, I know how bad that was! These CL are the worst type, pay them to do dunno what, some more spoil our things *hai….* Glad it’s all over now. Hope there’s no trauma caused by CL 🙂

54. whoisbaby - January 30, 2007

chill out. cool down. i feel your anger but you are still in the confinement month, so take care of yourself. just a few more days to go then she’ll be gone.

55. sue - January 30, 2007

So teruk laa… If I’m in your situation I would’ve exploded as well. Can never stand these things specially if they talk back. Why didn’t you threaten to deduct her pay? So did you give her the ang pow?

56. Confinement - Over « All About Zara and Zaria - January 30, 2007

[…] told her about not giving her a big ang pow, the CL said she understood and she was sorry about the kitchen top. To be fair to the CL, although she was not very helpful with other chores ourside of her […]

57. puifuen - January 30, 2007

baby’s pic is on msn 🙂 i’ve always thought your two girls looks so much like your husband when born, i think zara looks more like you now. still early days for zaria 🙂 congrats again!

58. WS - February 2, 2007

Congrats!!! I was lucky to have my mum to take care of me and baby during confinement. While mum cooked and take care of Ern during day time, I decided to take care of Ern by myself during night time. This is to enable my mum to have sleep and rest. Well, i guess being a b/feeding mum, you need to take care of your baby during night time.

I regreated following the pantang larang during confinement. It was stressful! So, when i have number 2, no more “confinment”. Else, i will be “confine” for the rest of my life! 🙂

59. AG - March 12, 2007

Oh my GOD!!! (excuse me!) I will go MENTAL if anyone were to do that my MY Kitchen!!!

60. Trust ourselves « Mummyregina's Blog - December 18, 2009

[…] i felt a bit better reading about nightmare stories about them like https://mytwogirls.wordpress.com/2007/01/24/confinement-lady-liability-to-the-home/ […]

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